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N03L · Posted: Apr Thursday, 2008 3:37 am Post subject: THREE BRIEF VIDEO GAME REVIEWS

Since I'm using the ps3 browser I won't be able to write long ass reviews but instead sort of short straight to the point reviews. Well, not really. Anyway here it goes. :D

In the past two months I have purchased three games:

Here's my REVIEW for:
THE ORANGE BOX (PS3, Xbox 360, and PC)
PS3 version review

Let me start off by saying that The Orange Box is one of the greatest values in gaming history because it's jam-packed with a variety kick ass world class content. Jes...

This is truly an unprecedented value! Why you ask? Well, because it comes with not 3 games like I originally thought but 5 games all for the price of 54 bucks (thats how much I bought it for)! Damn! I feel like a thief! Mr. Green

THREE OF THE 5 GAMES IT INCLUDES ARE:
Half Life 2
Half Life 2: Episode 1
Half Life 2: Episode 2

The Half Life 2 saga represents some of the greatest shooter gameplay ever made. This saga also includes the Gravity Gun which reinvented the way gamers interact with object. Continued on next post! Twisted Evil

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N03L · Posted: Apr Thursday, 2008 4:03 am Post subject:

CONTINUED!
THE BAD:
The BAD part of the Half Life sega is that the frame rate struggles at times which caused me to become so pissed that I cussed out the game. Mad

Not only that but the loading times can be a real pain in the ass. However these things are minor and the game itself is so bad ass that you rarely care about these things.

THE NEXT GAME IN THE ORANGE BOX IS CALLED:
PORTAL
Portal is a brilliant and humorous puzzle game. In this game you have to use the portal gun which creates portals (obviously) so that you could accomplish obstacle courses which become more complex and frustrating as you progress in the game. Portal is just a great original breath of fresh air.

THE LAST GAME IN THE ORANGE BOX IS:
TEAM FORTRESS 2:
A fantastic multiplayer only experience with a cartooney art style that lets you choose a class and jump in with other bastard gamers such as yourself in different maps. Weee!

FUCK! CONTINUED ON NEXT POST! FUCKEN PIECE OF SHIT!
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N03L · Posted: Apr Thursday, 2008 4:15 am Post subject:

BOTTOM FUCKEN LINE FOR THE ORANGE BOX:
This is a definite must have game for the platform that will provide countless hours of single and multiplayer action. So go ahead Kevin and Frank! BUY IT! It's alot of bang for your buck! Jes...

THE ORANGE BOX GETS Cool

and a half OUT OF TEN!

HINDU'S CORNER Shocked

THE ORANGE BOX REVIEW:
"Fuck the orange box!"- Hindu

STUPID FUCKEN PS3 BROWSER DOESNT LET ME FIT EVERYTHING IN ONE MOTHER FUCKEN POST SO THE REVIEW FOR WARHAWK IS ON THE NEXT POST. Evil or Very Mad

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N03L · Posted: Apr Thursday, 2008 4:49 am Post subject:

MY REVIEW FOR WARHAWK Cool

ONLY FOR THE PS3 Razz

Warhawk is a bad ass multiplayer-only online action experience.

PROS: Very Happy

Excellent play balance; The graphics are stunning especially when your blasting through the air. There's a wide variety of playstyles from on foot combat to driving around in jeeps (can carry up to 3 people) to drving in Tanks and to flying around in deadly Warhawk's. The game has robust online gameplay and there is no lag what so ever biotches even when theres a chaotic battle of 32 people. The battles are epic and vary from big ass maps to small maps where you are forced to take out your knife and fight in close combat. Cool

The best part is that this game is now available to download from the playstation store for 30 bucks! I bought it from Hindu for 25 bucks! Oh lastly you can play up to 4 players online.

CONS Sad

No tutorial; No single player campaign; friendly fire because "accidents" happen way too often! Mad

BOTTOM LINE ON NEXT FUCKEN POST!!!
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N03L · Posted: Apr Thursday, 2008 5:01 am Post subject:

BOTTOM LINE FOR WARHAWK
It's the most fun and intense online game for the ps3. BUY IT NOW! except for Frank unless he buys a PS3. Razz

WARHAWK GETS Cool

OUT OF 10!
Good Job

HINDU'S CORNER Shocked

.....

WARHAWK REVIEW:
"Warhawk is a good game"- Friendly neighborhood Hindu Good Job

MY REVIEW FOR RESISTANCE: FALL OF MAN IS ON THE NEXT POST YOU FUCK BAGS!
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N03L · Posted: Apr Thursday, 2008 5:28 am Post subject:

MY REVIEW FOR RESISTANCE: FALL OF MAN

Resistance successfully combines many of the best qualities from other great first person shooters. Groovy

with spectacular visuals too bad it's short lived and has now become a bland dead memory in my mind. The game's campaign is really good in the beginning but it became repetitive and I just couldn't motivate myself to even finish it. The only thing that saved this game from an early death is the online multiplayer however it doesn't match up to Warhawk. Which is why after getting Warhawk I just threw this game in a shelf and never looked back..... Evil or Very Mad

However Im sure that later I'll pop this game in the ps3 and give it a go Hmm...

............or not Tee-hee!

PROS

outstanding presentation; some cool weapons such as the hedghog which shoots spikes Cool

; Enemy AI is agressive and fairly intelligant; multiplayer modes support a whopping 40 players Shocked

FUCK! REVIEW CONTINUED ON NEXT POST!
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N03L · Posted: Apr Thursday, 2008 5:53 am Post subject:

RESISTANCE: FALL OF MAN REVIEW CONTINUED....
CONS Stupid

Gameplay is so freaken unoriginal (hey, but what can I say...FPS shooters tend to be that way) and it gets boring quick; the campaigns story seems dull and the characters aren't very well developed . This is one of the cases where a mute protagonist just doesn't work;

BOTTOM LINE:
Pretty good game for the first 2 days and then the rest is just..... Oh, good God!

BLAH! *vomits*. Rent this game! DONT BUY IT UNLESS YOU LIKE IT.

RESISTANCE: FALL OF MAN GETS Cool

out of 10

HINDU'S CORNER Shocked

RESISTANCE: FALL OF MAN REVIEW:
"Resistenc is cool"- Your Friendly Neighborhood Hindu What?

.....

THE END BITCHES! THESE REVIEWS WERE BASED ON MY OWN DAMN OPINION EXCEPT FOR HINDU'S CORNER. For the record the reason I stayed up all night was because my uncle got out of his cage. Shifty